why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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