he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize