What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
