we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
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