I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
