Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
