Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
4 words: hood of his car
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
