Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
