??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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