yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Randomize
