so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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