you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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