Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize