there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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