Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
