thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
