i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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