i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
We're too hungover to prance.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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