A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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