ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
