Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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