So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize
