Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
