wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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