Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
