that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
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