Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
