he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
