Sry I called you an 8
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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