He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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