I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Randomize