No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
