She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
