my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
