idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
