I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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