But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
