I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
