He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize