so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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