I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
