You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Randomize