GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
