As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
