I think my vagina is haunted
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Randomize
