I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
