Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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