Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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