dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize