at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
