): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
