Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize